10 Tips for “Getting Over It” By Heide Banks, Relationship Expert
1. Throw on some crying clothes and allow the tears to flow. You can usually find a good outfit in the workout section. Remember, nobody has ever drowned in their own tears!
2. Look for the humor in whatever is holding you back. The old expression “If it’s gonna be funny later it’s probably funny now” applies!
3. Write an ideal scenario of what you would like your life to be. If it’s a relationship you are trying to get over, describe what the next one would be like. Be as specific as possible.
4. Paint a circle around you (real or imaginary) as a symbol of the problem you’ve been living with. Then, step out of it. Imagine yourself stepping into a bigger, brighter future.
5. Write a reminder list. Include all the things that make you great. Start with your willingness to let go of the past and embrace a better future.
6. Surround yourself with positive friends. Don't hibernate. Ask them what makes you unique and write it down.
7. Forgive yourself for any mistakes you “think” you’ve made. Then, forgive the person who dumped, cheated, fired…whatevered…you. Thank them inwardly for letting you go and allowing you to move on to something bigger and better.
8. Forget closure. It is a mythical beast that keeps us stuck in whatever disappointed us. Instead use a photo or draw a picture of whatever hurt you and tell it whatever you need to end this chapter of your life. Then burn it. And don't forget to put away, return, throw away or safely burn any reminders that might be sitting around.
9. Healing can take time. Don’t keep looking back to see how far you’ve come. Deep hurt and disappointments tend to cycle back in our minds. This is okay -just don’t let the pain dictate your actions. Remember you are worthy of a great life and no one can take that from you.
10. Keep yourself busy. Now is the time to do all those things you've put off. Join the gym, test drive a new car, and turn the music up and dance. At the least, b r e a t h… The remedy to hurt and disappointment is joining and doing, not waiting for things to change.
